Toronto – After her 38 year-old son Ben Johnson moved out and got a job at Starbucks, Child Protective Services decided to investigate his mother, Deborah, for possible child neglect and abandonment.
“A neighbour saw Ben working as a barista at Starbucks, and she freaked out,” explained Deborah Johnson, whose son was, until recently, living in the basement. “When he told her he was living in a rented apartment with friends, she got even more frantic and contacted Child Protective Services.”
When CPS showed up at Ms. Johnson’s house, they immediately quizzed her about her fitness as a mother, demanding to know whether she had abdicated responsibility for any of her other adult children besides Ben.
“They couldn’t believe I allowed Ben to move out and start his own life, but they were absolutely appalled when I told them I don’t even pay his cell phone bill anymore.”
When asked to comment, CPS replied in an email: “Our top priority is Ben’s safety. We are concerned….”
Read the rest here. (Followed by story, “Local Child Wants to Press Button.”) And yes, this is satire! – L