— Here are two recent gems from my mailbox. I hope you can take a deep breath and summon the courage needed to face these gigantic problems. Try to be strong! – L.
Hope all is well! I wanted to send along a story idea that’d be great for your readers. [Really? MY readers?] As the school year winds down and kids get ready for summer vacation, it’s important for parents to know how they can help them re-adjust their schedules to accommodate the lazy days of longer sunlight, hot temperatures and staying up late. [Yes, how CAN we help them adjust to something so daunting? Longer sunlight AND no school — I’m not sure any child has ever had to deal with something that complex before!]
Depending on a child’s age, summer can be a time of playing outside all day or partying all night and sleeping in late, therefore messing with the strict sleep schedule that school afforded earlier in the year. [And…are you saying that’s good or bad?] Although late summer sleeping can be nice, changing one’s sleep schedule too drastically can actually lead to negative long-term health effects [Yes, this press release is actually warning us of the LONG-TERM NEGATIVE EFFECTS of enjoying summer!] – so, how can parents help their children adjust to summer sleep schedules? [HOW HOW HOW? I sure hope there’s an expert or book or app because otherwise my children might be harmed forever by that child destroyer: Summer vacation!]
Lenore Here — Naturally, the press release went on to recommend a summer adjustment expert, but here it won’t, because we’ve already got another thing to worry about: Filing your nails while pregnant!
Dear Lenore: Hope you’re having a fantastic day! [So glad you care…you person I’ve never met.] Many mommies-to-be want to keep their nails in tip-top shape throughout their pregnancy and while nursing, but going to the salon can be a major health detriment [Major?] as harsh grindings and filings [Do you get your nails done by a lumberjack?] can expose mom and baby to toxic chemicals. [Gosh! Have any moms or babies ever survived a visit to the nail salon? Doesn’t sound like it!] Does this mean the stylish mama has to put all her nail beauty efforts on hold for the time being?
Nope! With Custom Nail Solutions artificial nail kits, pregnant and nursing women can keep their nails primped and fancy without having to go to salons and risk breaking in harmful substances. [“Breaking” in? Spell check alert!] The kits give women beautiful, natural-looking, non-chipping, and everlasting custom-fit nails that are antibacterial and antimicrobial. [Do they also emit a magnet forcefield to keep out nuclear rays? I would expect nothing less!] Finally [Yes, FINALLY. I know I, for one, have been waiting on tenterhooks] …a safe way for moms-to-be and new mamas to keep their nails glam throughout the entire pregnancy and beyond!
Lenore here again: Sure, it sounds safe, but is it safe ENOUGH? Is anything????
Source: Custom Nail Solutions