Tag Archives | zero tolerance

What child walks the earth that can carry that Lowe's $4.98 children's shovel up younder stairs?

School to Child: We Will Carry that Shovel For You

. Think of our proud founding fathers, the Minutemen who ran in from the fields to wage a revolution. These were ordinary people entrusted to win the freedom of an entire country, accustomed as they were to toiling, being tested, and rising to the occasion. Here’s how we breed that out of our kids: Dear […]

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Hi! I'm dead, I bummed everyone out during the Super Bowl, and I'm not even the worst Free-Range story of last year!

The 10 Worst Free-Range Kids Stories of 2015 (and the 5 best!)

. A mash-up of the most insane events proceeding from the desire to keep our precious kids safe…no matter how moronically: 1 – Mom Who Overslept While Her Son Walked to School Handcuffed, Threatened with 10 Years’ Sentence In November, Connecticut mom Maria Hasankolli overslept while her son, age 8, got himself ready for school, […]

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Wait! What if that truck RUNS OVER the kids? Delusional principal worry # 47.

First Grader Suspended for 3 Days for Pretending to Shoot Pretend Arrow

. Writing in a note that, “I have no tolerance for any real, pretend, or imitated violence. The punishment is an out of school suspension,” the principal of Our Lady of Lourdes elementary school in Cincinnati, Joe Crachiolo, suspended a first grader for pretending to shoot another student with a pretend arrow in a pretend […]

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Okay, selling THESE at the school plant sale would be a little much.

Principal Writes: Your Children Must be Supervised at All Times

From the: “Don’t confuse me with the facts” dept. comes this note about a note: Dear Free-Range Kids: Our weekly school newsletter contained a paragraph about supervising children at school events with the gem “Unfortunately, the world is not as it was many years ago.” I responded with some objections, citing the various statistics about […]

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Wait! Did i forget my cell phone?

Dog Takes Bus by Herself (So Why Don’t We Let Our HUMAN Kids Do This?)

Considering we have municipalities making it illegal for kids to walk home by themselves from the bus stop, this doggy story from Seattle should give everyone…paws: “Did that just happen?” That’s the reaction one bus rider had in Seattle, after realizing a dog had just joined him for a ride through the city, traveling several stops […]

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brown bag

The Craziest Zero Tolerance Stories of 2014

This was the year a second grade teacher learned never to bring carpentry tools to school, even as a high school student in a bathing suit was forced to stand outside in the Minnesota winter. And then there’s the kid who was crazy enough to share his lunch. 1. Student, 13, shares lunch, gets detention A […]

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Are we afraid of almost everything, where our kids are concerned? BINGO!

UPDATE! See the Real Bingo Card for Child Hysteria Bingo!

LOOK! Thank you, Marjorie Ingall,  for making this into a Bingo Card! (And here’s a site that allows you to do the same. So fun!)  Readers — Commenter Jenny Islander sent in this brilliant Child Hysteria Bingo board! Feel free to add more ideas: Welp, I think I’ve finally read enough of Free-Range Kids to make […]

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Who is willing to take responsibility for an "unauthorized" sign out?

A School Office So Rule-Bound It Refuses to Think

Hang onto your goat. This story will totally get yours. It got mine. Dear Free-Range Kids: Every Friday, I pick my niece up from school. She is in 1st grade. Last Friday I was substitute teaching at her school, in her classroom no less. The fire alarm went off.  Smoke from a building project was venting […]

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