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    Free-Range Kids

    Help Needed: Vote for Title of My Free-Range Class at Hunter College

    August 12, 2013
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    Hey Readers — This fall I’m going to be offering a continuing ed class for parents through New York City’s Hunter College. But first…it needs a name! I’m wondering if you could vote on which name you like best. Here goes! (Sorry there are so many.)

    1 –  RAISING A LEADER…BY BACKING OFF  

    2 – HOW TO STOP WORRYING SO MUCH ABOUT YOUR KIDS* *FOR THEIR SAKE AND YOURS!  

    3 –  HOW TO STOP OVERWORRYING ABOUT YOUR KIDS  

    4 – KEEPING YOUR KIDS SAFE…WITHOUT HOVERING  

    5 – HOW TO BE A PERFECT PARENT AND RAISE A PERFECT KID* *No guarantees! But lots of help for anyone worried about “doing it right.”  

    6 –  HOW CAN I MAKE MY KID A HAPPY, CONFIDENT LEADER?* *Uh…you can’t. But if you learn to let go a little, they’ll do it on their own  

    7 – WHY AM I SO WORRIED ABOUT MY KIDS ALL THE TIME? An answer — and an antidote!  

    8 – HOW TO ENJOY YOUR KIDS…INSTEAD OF JUST WORRYING ABOUT THEM  

    9 – HOW TO GET YOUR KID INTO HARVARD…is not the topic of this class. But if you want to know how to stop WORRYING about that and enjoy your kid’s childhood– come on in!  

    10 –  STOP WORRYING ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT CAN GO WRONG WITH YOUR KID And start enjoying their childhood– so they can, too

    Please let me know if any of those sound like a class you or a friend might sign up for. No — a class that folks would DESPERATELY want to sign up for. Or write in a new name for the thing.

    No matter what it’s called, the class will consist of  4 sessions. In the classroom, we’ll look at how we got so afraid for our kids, and the things we loved doing when we were that we’re not letting our own kids do (!). We’ll also examine other eras, other places and real crime stats, to give a little perspective. All in all, it’s not too different from my book.

    Then, outside of class, there will be some fun exercises the parents can start doing as “homework,” that will allow them to step back and see how confident and capable their kids really are.

    And at the end? Everyone gets a trophy! (Nah…just joking.) But having done a whole TV series  where 12 of the 13 very nervous families I worked with ended up incredibly more relaxed and happy, I believe this class will be life changing, too. So, wish me luck and please: Vote! – L.

    Thomas_Hunter_Hall_Hunter_College_CUNY_from_south


    Hunter College, here we come!

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    62 Comments

    1. Gary on August 12, 2013 1:31 pm

      “8 — HOW TO ENJOY YOUR KIDS…INSTEAD OF JUST WORRYING ABOUT THEM ”

      I like it, but would change “enjoy” to “raise and enjoy”

    2. Linda Wightman on August 12, 2013 1:55 pm

      I think How to Raise Safe, Self-Reliant Children without Going Nuts With Worry beats them all. But if you’re in a really weird mood you might try Dr. FreeRange: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Trust My Kids.

    3. Really Bad Mum on August 12, 2013 2:02 pm

      #4 or How to raise free range kids without getting arrested.

    4. wombat94 on August 12, 2013 2:02 pm

      My favorite in the list is #1, though I would change it slightly.

      Raising a leader… by letting them lead.

      was my first reaction, but after writing it out, I would say it is not quite grammatically correct, so how about…

      Raising leaders… by letting them lead.

      or perhaps

      Raising tomorrow’s leaders… by letting them lead today.

      I don’t know… some variation on that theme is my favorite as long as there is an emphasis on the kids taking action in their own right. To me that’s a big part of what this whole movement is about, right?

    5. Emily on August 12, 2013 2:06 pm

      I like the first option, “Raising a Leader–By Backing Off,” because all the others are too long. That said, “Raising a Leader” sounds a lot like Raise a Reader, which is a completely different organization. Also, I think it’d be good if this course wasn’t just for parents, but for anyone who works with kids–teachers, sports coaches, Scout/Guide/4-H/Campfire leaders, aunts, uncles, grandparents, much older siblings, babysitters, you name it–because the Free Range movement is for everyone. It’s not just for parents, but it’s also for the grandparents who want to take their kids sledding on old wooden toboggans like they did as kids, or the Girl Guide leaders who are dying to take their Brownie group on a proper camping trip with a fire and s’mores and everything, instead of yet another week of “safety-approved” craft projects and Marshmallow Fluff, or the babysitter who’s afraid to take kids to the park without hovering over their every move. It’s even for the childless neighbours who might be tempted to call the authorities upon seeing an unsupervised child, even if that child looks healthy, unhurt, and contented. The course could teach those “random adults” the difference between a neglected child, and an independent one, and it might even result in a resurgence of the Block Parent program, so that “caring” doesn’t have to necessarily equate to “snitching” anymore. So, this course is a great idea, but please, make it open to anyone who wants to enroll, because if you do, then it might (slowly) result in a return to normalcy for everyone.

    6. Papilio on August 12, 2013 2:18 pm

      Oh that’s funny. These are all variations on the same theme, from the same perspective: what the parent should do or should stop doing in order to ‘make’ the child perfect.
      I would have thought, with the whole selfmade-man-entrepreneurial-spirit-of-the-American-Dream (that IS still the ultimate goal, right?), the perspective would be of the child succeeding, realizing its potential, blossoming etc, and then what the parents can do to assist that process. You know, the selfmade man, not the parentmade man.

      But I guess I understimated the modern parental need to controll that whole process rather than allowing it.

    7. Havva on August 12, 2013 2:18 pm

      8 — HOW TO ENJOY YOUR KIDS…INSTEAD OF JUST WORRYING ABOUT THEM

      That was pretty much what I was wondering when I started asking where does it end with the wall to wall safety? When can we start enjoying life? I found out that in the places I had been looking, *ahem parenting.com* it doesn’t. That’s when I asked: “Who was that NYC mom who put her 9 year old on the subway like a normal human? How is she so calm? And, has she written anything else about parenting?”

      I don’t know if that would get you more parents of babies, and toddlers, since that SIDS stuff is pretty intense and has a real joy sucking effect. But I do see value in the laying the ground work with the pre-range crowd.

    8. Beth on August 12, 2013 2:29 pm

      I like the 2nd one. I think billing it as being less stressed is a good idea.

    9. Lisa on August 12, 2013 2:42 pm

      Although I’m sure it is too long, I think:

      “9 — HOW TO GET YOUR KID INTO HARVARD…is not the topic of this class. But if you want to know how to stop WORRYING about that and enjoy your kid’s childhood— come on in!”

      Is the most compelling and made me smile!

      Good luck!

    10. Nicole G on August 12, 2013 2:48 pm

      I like the first one.

    11. Leppi on August 12, 2013 3:11 pm

      How to raise human beings – as God intended and mankind needs it!

    12. Rhonda on August 12, 2013 3:20 pm

      I liked #9 the best, despite the length.

      Now, though, I like Womat’s: How to Raise Tomorrow’s Leaders…By Letting Them Lead Today.

    13. heather deitchman-levy on August 12, 2013 3:23 pm

      Number 8 strikes me as the most appropriate.

    14. Ravana on August 12, 2013 3:28 pm

      Number 9 would sure sell around here but you’d have to put the subtitle in really tiny letters.

    15. HarleyPig on August 12, 2013 3:28 pm

      If I had to choose an existing title, it would #2. But I think “How to stop strangling your kids and feel better about it at the same time.”

    16. Another Mama for Parenting Sanity on August 12, 2013 3:31 pm

      Grounding the Helicopter Parent: A Safe, Sane, and Secure Approach to Raising Kids in the Age of Anxiety

    17. Crystal on August 12, 2013 4:33 pm

      How about “Turn in Your Pilot’s License: Teaching Children to Fly on Their Own” ?

    18. Beth Crowley on August 12, 2013 7:06 pm

      How about “Fear Free Parenting: Learn to Let Go and Start Enjoying the Ride!”

    19. oncefallendotcom on August 12, 2013 7:40 pm

      I was hoping you were going to take off with that “Escape from Alcatraz Parenting” idea you came up with some time back. You can start each class with the Dragnet theme… or Inspector Gadget. Wowzers!

    20. Namastemama on August 12, 2013 8:18 pm

      #4 or #7
      Although the Harvard one is kinda funny. People don’t read fine print though!

    21. John Flaherty on August 12, 2013 8:22 pm

      #2: HOW TO STOP WORRYING SO MUCH ABOUT YOUR KIDS* *FOR THEIR SAKE AND YOURS!

    22. Marie on August 12, 2013 8:25 pm

      I like #8 the best. I think the others are too wordy.

    23. NJ Mom on August 12, 2013 8:29 pm

      I like the LInda Whiteman, Another Mama… and Beth Crowley suggestions the best!

    24. Kenny Felder on August 12, 2013 8:31 pm

      You’ve put a tremendous amount of effort into building the brand “Free Range.” Why drop it now? I would call the class “Free Range Parenting.”

    25. Leigh on August 12, 2013 8:37 pm

      “If You Love Them, Set Them Free, (they’ll come home when they’re hungry)”

    26. Betsy on August 12, 2013 8:40 pm

      Brevity is probably good in this age of tweets, ergo #1 or #8. Good luck spreading the “faith”. But I also really like Linda Wightman’s idea – it might be a winner.

    27. Emily on August 12, 2013 8:44 pm

      @Kenny Felder–I like “Free Range Parenting” too, but I’d amend it slightly to “Join The Free Range Kids Movement” instead, because of the reasons I mentioned upthread–Free Range isn’t just for parents; it’s for every adult that works with kids.

    28. Ali on August 12, 2013 8:44 pm

      Parenting in an unsafe world.

      This will get the attention of the people you really need to reach 🙂 The world, after all, is unsafe. Just NOT in the way the mass media portrays. Balancing the reality of what is unsafe -and worth worrying about- and what is truly safe is really the goal, yes?

    29. highwayman on August 12, 2013 8:59 pm

      I vote number 8.

    30. Timothy Cooke on August 12, 2013 9:21 pm

      I like #4 best.

    31. lsl on August 12, 2013 9:29 pm

      #1. Maybe #4. The rest are more like descriptions than titles.

    32. Kay on August 12, 2013 10:40 pm

      I also think a short snappy title that conveys the message. Perhaps the descriptor to follow.

      I’m thinking somehow state the positive result, which will be the hook for these helicoptering parents to begin with- they do this because they are obsessed with their children’s safety and success. You are trying to show them it will be achieved better by getting them to back off.

      One aspect I’ve noticed is that many parents that do helicopter think they don’t. They think helicoptering is something more extreme than what they are doing but I think many don’t realize that is exactly what they are doing, even if it’s one aspect of their lives. I’ve seen many comments that say, “It’s called parenting.” in relation to them saying they keep their eyes on their children at all times, etc.

      Maybe something to get them to stop and think about it: “Over-protected, over-managed, over-scheduled kids – do you have helicopter tendencies in the parenting of your children? Come find out plus how to build your child’s confidence, responsibilities, self-esteem, and leadership skills to lead to future success.”

      “Does you child have what it takes to be a leader and free thinker? Come find out ways to help your child succeed and what you may be doing that impedes your child’s growth.”

      My suggestions are too long and I’m not sure if that is exactly the point you’re going for but I hope it goes well! Let us know what name you decide!

      Just want to add I really like Crystal’s and Another Mama’s suggestion, too!

    33. Brandy King on August 12, 2013 10:43 pm

      I like #4 is the best. #1 would be a second choice. I like these because they frame it positively — something you TO do instead of STOP doing. I think people respond better to that kind of framing. Hope it’s a successful course!

    34. Taradlion on August 12, 2013 11:07 pm

      “What are you worried about?”…

      “Not our parents’ kids…why we parent so differently now…”

    35. Melanie on August 12, 2013 11:09 pm

      #8

    36. SKL on August 12, 2013 11:18 pm

      Out of the choices, I liked #8 best.

      How about something like: raising successful adults by preserving childhood.

      I dunno, I’m not feeling very poetic right now. Had a run-in with the cops over my second-grade daughters sitting in a locked car for 3 minutes while I dropped off a FedEx. At 8:30pm (so no glaring sun, folks). Some lady sitting outside Starbucks called in a complaint. Seriously. Off to bang my head against a brick wall.

    37. Taradlion on August 12, 2013 11:41 pm

      Oh, SKL, sorry you had to deal with that. Hope it was over quickly.

    38. Stafir on August 13, 2013 12:04 am

      FREE RANGE KIDS
      Teaching Parents to teach kids how to teach themselves (too wordy?)

      FREE RANGE KIDS
      Raising kids the way your parents were raised.

      THERE IS MORE TO CHILDHOOD THAN WORRY.
      Putting Joy, Learning, and Discovery back into childhood.

      Of the ones offered in the post I like #2 best…#8 holds a soft spot as well..but the wording is a bit worrysome.

    39. Kathy on August 13, 2013 12:56 am

      Definitely #2. Some of them are just too wordy, even if they are amusing. I like two because it stresses that both the parent and child will benefit from less worrying.

    40. Karon on August 13, 2013 1:37 am

      Free-Range Parenting: This IS your father’s parenting.

      Or maybe

      Leave your helicopters at the door: How to raise a responsible adult.

    41. Brian on August 13, 2013 8:04 am

      Rational Parenting: What history and statistics can teach us about raising children

    42. Lisa on August 13, 2013 9:18 am

      Free Range Kids – for a happier parenthood

    43. Librarymomma on August 13, 2013 10:54 am

      I think #8 is the best out of the ones on your list, but if you could put “Free Range” somewhere in the title (there are some good examples above) it would be more informative.

    44. Puzzled on August 13, 2013 12:07 pm

      Can you ask the college to make this a required class for social work students?

    45. Merrick on August 13, 2013 12:31 pm

      I agree that Free Range Kids is the best title.

      How about – Vintage Parenting for Modern Kids?
      All things Vintage are HOT! LOL

    46. Rachel on August 13, 2013 12:47 pm

      Parenting Without Fear

    47. Papilio on August 13, 2013 1:29 pm

      No, people, no!
      You have to aim for a wider audience than just people who know and like FRK (I’m sure they’d like to meet Lenore, but I doubt it will really be a life-changing experience).
      Aiming for parents who feel they’re hovering/worrying/overprotective is better, but still, like Kay says, you assume those parents *know* they have a problem, that they should change.
      But judging from the (negative) comments I’ve read across the internet, many parents out there don’t think of their own parenting style as hovering or overprotective or negative in any way; they think what they’re doing is normal (!) and necessary (!!): “It’s called parenting (and parenting is not about your convenience)”. Suggesting they should follow this class because they stress a lot and could do less for their kid, will not sound good to parents who think FR parents are lazy anyway.
      If you want a broad range of parents, you need to focus on the benefit for the children, not the benefit for the parents. Be sneaky. Focus on what all those loving yet smothering folks want, and let that be the only assumption you make about them. Ask them if they want their kid to be safe & happy & succesful – who’d say no?
      And then say, ‘Oh yeah, it’ll save you a lot of stress, too’.

    48. Heather on August 13, 2013 4:53 pm

      Reclaiming Freedom: Worldproof Children

      H

    49. Heather on August 13, 2013 4:55 pm

      Reclaiming Freedom: Worldproof Your Children

      With or without the Your

      H

    50. Let_Her_Eat_Dirt on August 13, 2013 8:29 pm

      Of the bunch, I like #8 — the ones about “leaders” are the only ones that rub me the wrong way. I also like Heather’s suggestion about “Reclaiming Freedom.”

      Let Her Eat Dirt
      http://www.lethereatdirt.com
      A dad’s take on raising tough, adventurous girls

    51. Tiffany on August 13, 2013 9:51 pm

      I like #4! Short, to the point, and puts all your critics to shame.

    52. Anna on August 13, 2013 10:23 pm

      So many good suggestions! My thought was “Capable Confident Kids in 6 Easy (but possibly scary) Steps.”

    53. Arianne on August 13, 2013 11:14 pm

      I really like the ring of #7, but I kind of agree with Kenny above. It’s worth considering, anyway.

    54. SKL on August 13, 2013 11:32 pm

      Wise Parents, Competent kids, Supportive Communities

    55. Reader on August 14, 2013 1:04 am

      I think a shortened version of 10.
      10 – STOP WORRYING YOUR KID Enjoy their childhood— so they can, too

    56. Andrea on August 14, 2013 12:05 pm

      I think it depends on your audience. If your audience is people interested in raising Free Range kids, then 1,6,5, and 8 are good. #5 was my favorite. But if it is a general interest parenting class, I would leave the hook off the title and go with something like the following:

      RAISING A LEADER

      KEEPING YOUR KIDS SAFE

      HOW CAN I RAISE MY KID TO BE A HAPPY AND CONFIDENT?

      Then, when you get them in the class, you add the rest about backing off, not worrying, etc. But I would leave out anything that suggests not worrying or other free range parenting techniques in the title. It will severely limit your target audience.

    57. Ellie on August 14, 2013 4:53 pm

      Free-Range Parenting: How to Raise Safe and Happy Kids without Freaking Out

      Or something like that. I agree with others that Free-Range Parenting (or Kids) is already a hook, and you have a following!

      Otherwise, I think the “How to”s are what people look for.

    58. Susan on August 14, 2013 11:58 pm

      Definitely #8!

    59. FQ on August 15, 2013 1:47 am

      4 and 8

    60. Michael Chermside on August 16, 2013 8:03 am

      I prefer suggestions #1 and #2.

    61. Jason on August 16, 2013 5:51 pm

      Lenore, you have a brand. Use it. Name it something like Raising Freerange Kids: Letting go of your fear to raise a child to be prepared for the world.

    62. Michael Garbus on August 17, 2013 9:02 pm

      Free Range Kids.
      If they are signing up they know something about you, your blog, or what you are about. As said above. You have a brand. Use it. Keep it simple.

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