Extremely Helpful Tips!

At last — the kind of safety info any new parent could use. You’ll be so glad you looked! Click here!

17 Responses to Extremely Helpful Tips!

  1. Kelly October 13, 2009 at 8:04 am #


  2. MaeMae October 13, 2009 at 8:26 am #

    That was great! Very informative. However, I have been known to hose the kid down after a particularly dirty diaper. : P

    Once again, thanks for the laugh, Lenore.

  3. peaceful guide October 13, 2009 at 9:14 am #

    So wait, I can’t spike the baby’s bottle to get him to mellow out?

  4. Lillian October 13, 2009 at 9:19 am #

    LOVE these!!

  5. Meagan October 13, 2009 at 9:20 am #

    No! Peaceful Guide- alcohol is only for tooth aces, colds, and general entertainment (baby+bourbon=family fun).

  6. babelbabe October 13, 2009 at 9:21 am #

    reminds me of those Carl (the Rottweiler) books…

  7. Michele October 13, 2009 at 9:43 am #

    Cute! Thanks for the chuckles.

  8. Tana October 13, 2009 at 10:32 am #

    i’m gonna have to revise my entire parenting style now…

  9. Kim October 13, 2009 at 11:03 am #

    Well, I guess I failed the parenting test too…I’ve had to hose down my daughter a couple of times when she’s had diaper blowouts. Of course, I only used the shower hose, not the garden hose, so maybe that doesn’t count.

  10. gramomster October 13, 2009 at 8:17 pm #

    Too funny! I love the introduction to family pets. We don’t put the baby in the fish tank?

  11. Dot Khan October 13, 2009 at 9:20 pm #

    The National Lampoon humor magazine did a parody of a parenting magazine called Negligent Mother back around 1974. There was a picture to go with an ad for Sparties diapers showing a baby enclosed up to its neck in a huge diaper. It was intended to be worn for a week, after which you lift the baby out by the neck and hose them down.

  12. Melissa October 13, 2009 at 9:23 pm #

    Love it!

  13. jim October 13, 2009 at 10:40 pm #

    @Dot Khan – Thanks! I’ve been recommending the Hefty-bag-around-the-neck-and-a-weekly-hosing thing for years (often claiming that was the way I was raised) but couldn’t remember where I stole the idea. Should have figured it was Lampoon. A while back I turned a 20-something on to the “Lemmings” album and when it got to “Colorado” (a John Denver parody about a bunch of hippies in a snowed-in commune) the line “Baby didn’t die until we’d burned up all our wood/ Considering we ate her raw, she tasted pretty good!” he blew Dr. Pepper out his nostrils.

  14. Uly October 14, 2009 at 2:27 am #

    You’re missing some!


  15. Uly October 14, 2009 at 2:29 am #

    Sorry, make that link http://www.frakincool.com/pictures/parenting-101/ instead.

    My favorite is the “bonding with baby” one, although “shopping with baby” is a close second. I actually saw a family do that once, with a newborn. It was one thing to put the clothes on top of the baby in the stroller, but to put the dog on top of the baby (and then wonder aloud how the baby got a scratch on his face!) was a bit much. Not dangerous, just… kinda dumb. That baby could’ve hurt the little dog by flailing!

  16. Holly October 14, 2009 at 6:08 am #

    Ha! That reminded me of this video. I think you’ll enjoy it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWyeTRl_y1A

  17. hockey October 14, 2009 at 6:16 pm #

    very funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That’s awesome thanks for the laughs.