Close Menu
Free-Range Kids
    Free-Range KidsFree-Range Kids
    • Home
    • TV Show
    • Press
    • Have Lenore Speak
    • FAQ
    • FRK Project
    • Book
    • Crime Stats
    • Bill of Rights
    • Laws
    • Contact
    • Donate
    • Privacy
    Free-Range Kids

    Grieving Mom Warns: “This Could Happen to Any Family with a 300-Pound Pet Python”

    September 30, 2016
    Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email
    Share
    Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

    .

    All hail The Onion and it’s “Today Now” show! As the host notes of this story, “It’s the moment that every parent with a 20-foot long snake fears most, and one you can’t possibly predict.”

    (Sorry about the 30-sec ad before it…which I don’t even understand):

    .

    .

    Little Jack Shaw and his pet python.
    Little Jack Shaw and his pet python.

    .

    Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email

    Related Posts

    Camp Director Georgia Del Favero: Why I Don’t Post Daily Photos from Our Overnight Camp

    May 5, 2025

    Leaving Baby Alone in a Hotel Room with a Monitor: Is That Okay?

    May 1, 2025

    “There But For The Grace of God Go I” Parenting Pledge

    April 28, 2025

    15 Comments

    1. DrTorch on September 30, 2016 8:55 am

      The pic w/ the mouse costume is too much.

      Great Friday funny.

    2. lollipoplover on September 30, 2016 9:22 am

      “Jaws is like a son to us”

      I’m dying here.

      “To donate to buy a much needed Therapy Snake”

      Thanks for the laughs this morning. The sensationalism in the media of accidental deaths in children is nauseating. I’m loving the Onion News Network, so hard to tell which is real and fake anymore.

    3. M on September 30, 2016 10:17 am

      LOL!

    4. angie on September 30, 2016 10:20 am

      Saw the picture and couldn’t watch the video. I hate you, this is almost as bad as clowns.

    5. Vicki Bradley on September 30, 2016 10:23 am

      I couldn’t stop laughing the whole time I was watching this. I love the part where the mom talks leaving her son and the snake playing together, while she went shopping, then to the movies. Also, it’s hilarious the way the tone of the show becomes so cheery so quickly when the anchors, with big smiles on their faces, are introducing the next segment.

    6. Michelle on September 30, 2016 10:49 am

      OMG, for a second I thought this was real. You got me!

    7. Powers on September 30, 2016 12:00 pm

      Isn’t this segment actually satirizing those of us who don’t want to blame parents for every tragedy?

    8. pentamom on September 30, 2016 1:57 pm

      I don’t know why you have a problem with this. If it prevents even one family from allowing their python to babysit their child, it doesn’t matter how unusual it is, it’s worth publicizing.

    9. pentamom on September 30, 2016 1:59 pm

      Powers — or maybe it’s just laughing along with us at the idea that if parents are not heaped with guilt and judged by paranoid standards, there will be no common sense about putting children in dangerous situations.

    10. sexhysteria on October 1, 2016 3:25 am

      Incredible insight!

    11. Avin on October 1, 2016 5:22 pm

      God Bless the Onion, oh how I love them so. Thanks for sharing Lenore.

      I came across this fitting parenting gem too. I probably look like this when I’m out alone with my three. Hahah

      http://www.theonion.com/article/single-woman-3-young-children-unaware-she-subject–51039?utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF&utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMarketing

    12. BL on October 1, 2016 7:44 pm

      @Avin
      “I came across this fitting parenting gem too”

      And there was this:

      http://www.theonion.com/article/report-cost-of-raising-neglected-children-still-lo-37286

    13. ezymel on October 1, 2016 7:58 pm

      When viewing this, I thought it really happened but when I came to the name of the web site, then I knew it was a hoax. I could not fathom this happening. I am not saying something like this can’t happen as anything can happen. The 30 second ad of Dennys at the beginning, I thought maybe a python dinner is on the menu. ha ha

    14. Dale Smith on October 2, 2016 12:12 pm

      This site is the best! I am a teacher and a tutor. This is the best

    15. Avin on October 2, 2016 6:08 pm

      @BL –

      Bwhahahah! That link you shared is hysterical as well!!

    Sign up for Our Mailing List
    * = required field
    Free-Range Kids
    Fighting the belief that our children are in constant danger from creeps, kidnapping, germs, grades, flashers, frustration, failure, baby snatchers, bugs, bullies, men, sleepovers and/or the perils of a non-organic grape.
    Join us!
    Follow me on Twitter
    Follow me on Facebook
    Free membership card for kids: "I'm not lost! I'm a Free-Range Kid!"
    Visit Let Grow, the nonprofit promoting childhood independence
    Links
    Pro or Con?
    Why Free-Range?
    Free-Range Archives
    • 2025
    • 2024
    • 2023
    • 2022
    • 2021
    • 2020
    • 2019
    • 2018
    • 2017
    • 2016
    • 2015
    • 2014
    • 2013
    • 2012
    • 2011
    • 2010
    • 2009
    • 2008
    Copyright © 2008-2025 Free-Range Kids. All rights reserved.

    Web design by GenuineClass

    Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.

    Add Free-Range Kids to your Homescreen!

    Add