Hi Readers — Paxton, a small town in Illinois, where the land is flat as flat can be, is about to lose its only sledding hill to the Abominable Insurance Man. So says Esquire:
Paxton Park District’s insurance provider ruled that its sledding hill is too risky. “The insurance would have skyrocketed if someone was hurt,” a parks board member told The Champaign News-Gazette.
Bad as that sounds, here’s the Orwellian worst:
“I can imagine that the first couple of times it snows, they’ll think about the hill and come out and see it’s not there and be disappointed,” the recreation director said, “but I’m hoping within a couple of years it will be forgotten.”
Yes, and let’s hope kids forget that there was ever a time when they could play outside, walk to school, or meet up at the park, while we’re at it. Let’s hope they forget there was ever anything to childhood except Kumon and cat memes. What a glorious future. – L.
Mom, what the heck is THAT thing for?