Columbia University Professor Samantha Boardman is a psychiatrist — but she has come to suspect the whole psychological model might have it backwards: Rather than trying to help patients to change their thoughts as the key to changing their lives, vice versa could be the way to go. That’s pretty radical…and pretty helpful. In her new book, “Everyday Vitality: Turning Stress into Strength,” she argues that satisfaction doesn’t come from “within” it comes from “with.” That is, engaging WITH people, activities, interests, obligations, even nature. Think about how much better you usually feel after taking a walk, or having coffee…
Author: lskenazy
Google, “Hero, Age 5…” or 6, or 7, etc., etc., you will find a trove of stories so amazing you want to cheer and cry — and also scream: “SINCE WHEN DID WE DECIDE NO ONE UNDER AGE 9 CAN DO ANYTHING SAFELY ON THEIR OWN?” Kids’ brains, souls, smarts, bravery — all of that is building from Day 1. By age 5 — yes, 5! — developmental psychologists say they are capable of doing a whole lot on their own. And yet, many of those in charge of our lives, including politicians, police and child protection authorities, pull an…
This video is so inspirational! It doesn’t blame parents who moved to the ‘burbs. It suggests that getting kids back to bike-riding could be key to making them happier — and the whole suburb as well. Take a look! And more of my thoughts can be found at Let Grow by clicking here.
Wha…? Well, let me hasten to add that I’m talking about the folks running insurance companies in GERMANY. There, they have found that kids growing up with little chance to learn how to assess risk (because, in part, the playgrounds are so safe and boring) end up accidentally hurting themselves more often as adults. That costs insurance companies money! So their solution — based on research — is to have playground designers make exciting, even daunting equipment that requires kids to pay more attention to what they’re doing. This explains why some German playgrounds have installed climbing structures that are…
A reader sent in this list of her town’s trick-or-treat suggestions. None are egregious — but the length of this list is. COME ON. Somehow kids trick or treated for decades, if not millennia, without advice to plan the route in advance, make sure to always take along an adult, don’t trample the flowerbeds, carry a flashlight, walk don’t run, walk with your head up, don’t cut across yards, carry a flashlight and bring an EXTRA BAG in case yours breaks. We are exhorting children to act like middle-aged matrons. Worse — a list of TWENTY-FIVE tips turns a normal…
At a lecture on religion I attended long ago, the scholar explained that age-old religious symbols stay the same, it’s just their meaning that changes. The torches in a pagan Solstice celebration turn into the candles on the branches of the Hanukah menorah, turn into the bright lights blinking on a Christmas tree. Similarly, the idea of neighbors giving kids poison on Halloween stays ever on point, except now, instead of a Snickers spiked with strychnine, or cannabis disguised as Swedish fish, this year it’s Ecstasy shaped like Smarties, a fantastical fallacy I discuss over at Let Grow. Somehow we…
If you’re a single mom, you most likely have faced some time when you needed to have your kids handle something without you — get home from school, run an errand, stay home alone for a bit. If YOU know they’re ready, then…they are! That’s what the Reasonable Childhood Independence bills say, too. At this point three states — Texas, Oklahoma and Utah — have passed such bills, with the help of Let Grow. This coming year we will be working in another handful of states, including Colorado, Utah, South Carolina, Idaho and…potentially one or two more. The bill narrows…
…it made such a huge and exciting difference, the pilot project was expanded to the entire 2500-kid program. Now all practices at Steel Sports begin with 10-20 minutes of the kids just playing, making up new moves, and even goofy new games with new rules. “What we’re seeing is very often the kids run to practice now, rather than walk, because they know they’re going straight into 10 or 15 minutes of free play.” That’s what the head of coach development, Ian Hughes, said. And if you want your mind blown by how amazing kids can be, read my Q&A…
A high school student wrote a note to his 7th grade teacher who had made him do something he is now extremely grateful for. She made him get out of his comfort zone, again and again — 20 times — by doing The Let Grow Project. That is, 20 times in a single year she made every student in her class go home and do something new, on their own, without their parents. The idea was to get kids (and their parents) used to independence, including the confusion and risk involved in doing some everyday activities without constant adult assistance…
It is really hard to figure out when to trust our kids to be on their own, thanks to several issues swirling around: 1 – The fear industry that turns everything into a worst case scenario: “What if your son stays home alone and there’s a fire?” 2 – The shame industry: “I walked your son home from the playdate because he said he’d walked here all by himself.” 3 – The confusion industry: “Children may not be left without proper supervision or guardianship.” What the heck does that mean? A 24-hour security guard or a cell phone and a…