Are kids on their phones all the time because that’s what they love the most? An explosive new Harris Poll finds that actually, what kids 8-12 REALLY want to do is hang out together in real life – with no adults hovering, and no screens. They go online because that’s the only place they can meet up and have fun without constant adult supervision. Being glued to screens is their DEFAULT not their DESIRE. The Harris Poll gave kids a choice: In an Atlantic piece I co-authored with Jonathan Haidt (author of The Anxious Generation and my Let Grow co-founder) and Zach…
Author: lskenazy
Am I insulted? Miffed? Mad that I am called a “rambunctious” provocateur compared to my friend and Let Grow co-founder Jonathan Haidt’s gravitas? I AM THRILLED! Who wouldn’t love their ideas repackaged and recommended by one of the world’s leading brainiacs…er…public intellectuals? Here’s the juicy paragraph from a New Yorker article by Mollie Fischer that ran a week or so ago about a new book on kids and phones: Part of Haidt’s appeal to terrified parents is his willingness to provide a stern and confident prescription: no smartphones before high school, no social media before sixteen, no phones in schools,…
Oh how I love this essay on child surveillance by Elizabeth Leigh Hunter. As she notes: The Alpha Generation is the most surveilled group of people on the planet. That merits more than a “Well, I barely ever look at it” shrug, which is how most people think about tracking apps and monitors. Elizabeth is a Seattle-based writer at Seattle’s Child Magazine and mom of two. For the last few years she has worked tirelessly to help people understand not only the NEED for childhood independence, but the JOY of it. She founded a Let Grow Play Club at her children’s school and is writing…
We keep gently reminding (okay, sometimes hectoring) parents to step back to allow kids to step up. But what if a kid doesn’t WANT to step up…or even get off the couch? Here’s a note from a reader: Advice Needed! Dear Let Grow: My son loves his independence. His older sister, not so much. In Grade 4, she still holds my hand while walking to the school bus and is very upset that I have determined that they will walk the last two blocks on their own. Daily, she begs me to walk all the way. I know that she…
You may have heard me talk (endlessly) about how much kids need some time on their own. And how parents – depending on their neighborhood, the age of their kids, yada yada yada – should try to steel themselves and let their kids walk to school, play outside, run an errand, also yada yada yada. But it is not only anxiety that’s making this hard for parents. There are other forces working against them: The car-centric design of many modern suburbs, for one (explained well here). And now, an increasing unwillingness to tolerate unaccompanied tweens and teens in malls and other…
If you’re over 35, you probably remember playing outside till the streetlights came on. But today, a lot of parents worry that if they let their kids play the old-fashioned way – spontaneously, unsupervised, with whoever’s available in the neighborhood — their children will be bullied by kids older than them. Here are some ways for you to help them (and you!) put those fears in perspective: 1. Mixed-age play reduces bullying Bullying is actually less common when kids play in mixed-age groups. Older kids often (imperfectly, of course) step into the caregiver role. It’s actually how they start to…
What happens when you get a bunch of kids together and set them free to have fun? Death! Examining death, that is – a dead rodent. That’s what I heard from Beshlie Donaldson. She came to my attention when she commented on a Facebook post by another mom, Sara P, who’d started a Let Grow Play Club at her park. Here’s Sara’s Club: Beshlie commented: Wonderful! I started one in our local park after school on Fridays. This week the highlight was when the kids found a dead mole! So nice to see them playing freely in the woods, the…
UPDATE: The parents WERE allowed to attend the funeral after all. But they are still facing charges. What’s more, they have not been able to afford a tombstone for their son’s grave, so a friend started a fundraiser to help them. The link is here. Unspeakable Cruelty A mom and dad who let their kids, 7 and 10, walk to the grocery in a city outside of Charlotte, NC, are grieving today because the 7-year-old ran into the street and was killed by a car. If you had to decide on a punishment for the parents, would you: A –…
The worry that our kids will die the second they step outside feels innate, but it has been cultivated by a society peddling fear. One prime example? The new ad for the Life360 tracking app. (Video at bottom of post. Screengrab above.) It features a mom singing a Disney-sweet song to her daughter who looks to be high school age: You are my whole wide world My heart, my joy, my baby girl You’ll never know how much I love you! When you’re gone I just think of you… Dying. The girl reacts the way you probably just did: “WHAT???”…
Here’s a little note from Helen, a “helicopter mom” who’s changing. As can you! And if you do, please drop us a line: Hi there! Just read your book Free Range Kids. I was led to it by reading Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation. And I was led to Haidt by watching Adolescence and also from getting involved in a local Smartphone Free Childhood group. So, I’ve been educating myself. And I realized I was a helicopter parent and it’s time to let go. Since reading your book I have: – sent my 6 and 8 year old kids to the post box (3 mins walk away) to…