Mom Investigated for Letting Son, 38, Live on Own


Hats off to Sarah Sahagian for understanding aznkhainzi
this issue
so deeply, as her reporting in The Beaverton indicates:

Toronto – After her 38 year-old son Ben Johnson moved out and got a job at Starbucks, Child Protective Services decided to investigate his mother, Deborah, for possible child neglect and abandonment.

“A neighbour saw Ben working as a barista at Starbucks, and she freaked out,” explained Deborah Johnson, whose son was, until recently, living in the basement. “When he told her he was living in a rented apartment with friends, she got even more frantic and contacted Child Protective Services.”

When CPS showed up at Ms. Johnson’s house, they immediately quizzed her about her fitness as a mother, demanding to know whether she had abdicated responsibility for any of her other adult children besides Ben.

“They couldn’t believe I allowed Ben to move out and start his own life, but they were absolutely appalled when I told them I don’t even pay his cell phone bill anymore.”

When asked to comment, CPS replied in an email: “Our top priority is Ben’s safety. We are concerned….”

Read the rest here. (Followed by story, “Local Child Wants to Press Button.”) And yes, this is satire! – L


An unsupervised 38-year-old. Where are his parents???

Where are his parents???


, , , , , , , , ,

16 Responses to Mom Investigated for Letting Son, 38, Live on Own

  1. J.T. Wenting April 24, 2016 at 12:12 am #

    good bit of future reporting…

  2. North of 49 April 24, 2016 at 1:06 am #

    The Beaverton is the Canadian version of the Onion.

  3. Craig April 24, 2016 at 3:49 am #

    This article is to reporting as the film Idiocracy is to film making. It points to a future that is getting closer every day. John Gatto has it right in that one of the purposes of school is to extend adolescence. I have seen evidence in my own world of adolescence being extended now into the 40s. Arenas are full of them. Look at the adolescents in their 20s screaming for safe spaces in colleges, free from uncomfortable ideas or words where they can curl up in a fetal position with a blankie and watch some cartoons. (not kidding, this exists) What they really all need is therapy.

  4. Avid Lurker April 24, 2016 at 7:56 am #

    This was from The Onion, right? Or a similar satire site?

  5. pentamom April 24, 2016 at 9:39 am #

    I thought this was going to be about a disabled adult. Glad to see it’s satire.

  6. Art April 24, 2016 at 10:25 am #

    As one of other posters pointed out, Idiocracy was supposed to be satire, not nonfiction.

  7. Backroads April 24, 2016 at 12:26 pm #

    Even if it were a disabled adult and not satire (where it certainly rocks), I would say “Good for Mom!”

  8. Sandi April 24, 2016 at 12:57 pm #

    But CPS forgot to check in the fridge!

  9. Mike April 24, 2016 at 1:28 pm #

    @Sandi, they did check the fridge, but were unable to report as they passed out from horror. They found (it’s probably best to avert your eyes) healthy food, lots of fruit and vegetables, fresh milk, and (this is the part where they fainted) NO junk food.

    It was enough to make the fat CPS parasite flee in horror.

  10. Reziac April 24, 2016 at 2:14 pm #

    Worse, there’s a pair of SCISSORS in that picture. He could run with scissors, and then who knows what would happen!!

  11. Dean Whinery April 24, 2016 at 3:48 pm #

    Was starting to worry. When I returned from the Army, I lived with my parents a few years until I bought my own home and was left unattended. The child welfare nannies might have a problem questioning my parents, but if they want it, I can provide their plot number. Glad it was satire, but maybe I need to find my safe place for a while anyway.

  12. dancing on thin ice April 25, 2016 at 2:12 am #

    I’ve heard from more than one adult having to move back home due to a disability as having helicopter parents. Although grateful, they are just like anyone else wishing for as much independence as they are capable of handling.

  13. EricS April 25, 2016 at 11:05 am #

    Lol! We all know this is a joke, but the principals of over reach and panic of CPS holds true. And technically, though not 38, there are 20 somethings (I know one as old as 29), that still rely quite a bit on mommy and daddy for almost everything. Including living arrangements. Their cars are paid for by parents, including their insurance. Mobile bills paid by parents. Laundry, cooking, and cleaning? Yup, parents. And mom and dad, continue to let this happen. While many of them are bewildered how their kid(s) turned out this way. Which is the most funny and ironic part of these kids of parents.

  14. John April 25, 2016 at 12:20 pm #

    The guy is 38-years-old! So why did CHILD Protective Services get involved with this to begin with? Was the guy mentally handicapped? Was he severely autistic? What? Still, he’s an adult. Something’s amiss here.

  15. pentamom April 25, 2016 at 2:05 pm #

    @John, it’s satire. The Beaverton is a fake news site.

  16. Vaughan Evans April 27, 2016 at 7:56 pm #

    You can e-mail me at
    I live in Canada. I know that some people in your country are displaying extreme behaviour.
    They are as bad as the hippies-who were displaying extreme behaviour.
    Some of the people in my junior collge sympathized with the Black Panthers.
    Today’s feminist women are making the same mistakes-as the veterans-who came home from the war.

    Th mothers of 1945-1965 wanted to “keep their hubby happy.”

    Today parents of BOTh sexes want to keep theri children happy.

    In the 1970;s I sympathized with the feminists, Women and childree WERE treated foolishly and condescendingly.

    However, at a time when things have graetly improved from women, children, disabled persons, aboriginal, and ethnic people, the opposite has occurred.

    White males,( particularly single white males are given the short end of the stick.”

    My father was a Second World War Veteran. From 1944-1976, he had his meals cooked, his washing done, his shopping done, his cleaning done.
    Now many men have to do EVERYTHING themselves.

    _They can’t ask anyone for help.
    One of the most important reasons for this -is that grandparents spend much of their time chauffeuring grandchildren-and doing favours for their adult children-while the latter go to work.
    Many people in their 60’s also do favours-for disabled siblings-and eldery parents.